The Kingsmen should have been your classic one-hit wonder. They could have even ended up being the ultimate example. While they didn't write "Louie Louie", they made the definitive recording of it, one which has lasted for over sixty years.
Unfortunately, no one aspires to be a one and done hit maker. (Actually, I can think of at least one exception; we'll be getting to him and his band in a few years from now) A group has a hit and then they try for another. Record labels and management begin to get involved. A newfound fanbase becomes keen for more. This is a manageable situation if you're The Beatles or Elvis or The Supremes (and, indeed, many without such vast talents) but a more daunting challenge when there was never much to your band to begin with.
"Louie Louie" was a global smash for The Kingsmen that was followed by their cover of Barrett Strong's "Money (That's What I Want)", which also happened to be the closing track on The Beatles' second album With the Beatles. It's ramshackle enough but doesn't have the spirited, drunken party vibes of its predecessor. "Little Latin Lupe Lu" and "Death of an Angel" were minor hits for the band in 1964. By this point, the law of diminishing returns was setting in.
Perhaps out of desperation The Kingsmen chose to go with a novelty song as their fifth single. While "Louie Louie" had been this rough mix of garage rock and surf rock that critics have subsequently (and far too generously) termed "proto-punk", much of its appeal came down to it being a party anthem with those stupidly wonderful words that no one could understand. It may not have been intended as a novelty hit but that's how many took it. On "The Jolly Green Giant" it's as if they're trying too hard at what had previously been second nature to them. While "Louie Louie" had been unintentionally taken as novelty pop, there was no mistaking the way their first single of 1965 had been meant to be interpreted. The kids were expected to find this thing funny.
Suffice it to say, it isn't. Of course, this was a dozen years prior to my birth and I can't speak to how humourous youngsters found it back then but I'm going to guess that they either didn't get the gag or that it was amusing that first time anyone heard it. Boys and girls who turned up their noses at broccoli, Brussel sprouts and spinach might have found a record that spoke to them ("It was funny to me in 5th Grade, since we were all familiar with Green Giant commercials on TV", notes one YouTube comment) but it's hard to imagine how anyone else could have found anything to like in it.
It's basically just a sloppy R&B romp in which everyone is meant to be horsing around. While the tune is undistinguished, it's the "singing" that really drags it down. Gone are the casual don't-give-a-fuck vocals from "Louie Louie" which are replaced by a bunch of dweebs trying to act cool while rattling off the life story of a frozen foods mascot. Worse of all are the fill ins ("potatoes", "artichoke hearts", etc., etc.) which make it even lamer. If their signature hit proved to be a glorious example of falling upwards, this lousy single proves that they weren't about to be so lucky again. How the giants have fallen.
Score: 2
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C'Mon, Be a CHUM!
We haven't taken a look at Canada's former national chart in a while so let's see how it's doing in the early stages of '65. With The Beatles' pairing of "I Feel Fine" and "She's a Woman" being a holdover from the end of '64, there have only been two new chart toppers so far: Petula Clark's "Downtown" and Gary Lewis and the Playboys with "This Diamond Ring", a single that had peaked at number three and was already off the RPM chart by this point. While certainly no classic, it is a definite step up from the ghastly piece of shit above. Jerry Lewis' son Gary isn't a particularly good singer though his background in comedy might have aided The Kingsmen. A rock 'n' roll 'What If...' if there ever was one.
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