Hank Locklin: "Please Help Me, I'm Falling"

July 4, 1960 (2 weeks)

So, as I said last time, Connie Francis' "Everybody's Somebody's Fool" was kind of, sort of country - even if it's mainly just a pop song. Prior to that there was the country-ish "He'll Have to Go" by Jim Reeves and, rather neatly, its equally popular reply song "He'll Have to Stay" by Jeanne Black, the Tex-Mex stylings of Marty Robbins' "El Paso" and "The Battle of New Orleans" by Johnny Horton which is only really country because no one could come up with a better term for it. Oh, and a handful of others by The Browns and Guy Mitchell and — what the hell — Conway Twitty, who would one day become a legit C&W star.

But it was only on American Independence Day, 1960 that the Canadian hit parade would be topped for the first time by a true country single, "Please Help Me, I'm Falling" by Hank Locklin. It is no hybrid: there's no trace of easy listening, big band, beat music or anything from a foreign country. Just the straight up country music goods.

He isn't the oldest individual to top the CHUM charts but there's something positively ancient about Hank Locklin being at number one in 1960. (And I say this as someone who is currently five years older than his nibs was at that time) Perhaps it's because we're dealing with the genuine article here. But then that gives it a horrible timelessness: if it could've been recorded ten or fifteen years earlier, why are we even having to bother with it now?

Rationally speaking, there's nothing really wrong with it. Locklin's voice is strong if a little generic sounding and the tune is amiable enough. I just can't get through the entirety of its brief running time without the overwhelming urge to turn it off and switch to something better and more engaging. Far more interesting things were being done in country music at the time. In fact, down at number fifty during the first of Locklin's two weeks at the top with "Please Help Me, I'm Falling" was "Above and Beyond" by Buck Owens. Though not quite one of the top tier works by the future Hee Haw presenter, it is an early indication that he would soon enter Imperial Period to rival any in the history of country music. (Honestly, I don't think there's anyone with a better collection of singles and that includes Hank Williams and his much loved 40 Greatest Hits) Yet, it did no better than number eight on the CHUM listings, which turned out to be Owens' highest position on Canada's pop charts.

It's as though country artists had three main options in the early sixties. I'll present them as if I'm giving Hank Locklin advice just like I did for The King.

1) Adapt. Bring in strings or a rock 'n' roll beat or exotic sounds from elsewhere. The purists will no doubt be pissed off but those people are always fuming about something. Those of us who care about listening to music won't give a toss. This approach may or may not work out but at least you gave it the old college try.

2) Have at It. Get a cracking band together and play tough bar band country and western for people to dance to, get drunk and have sex — and, indeed, plenty more. That doesn't mean you have to pretend to be a phony baloney outlaw or any of that pretentious dog shit, only to know that your job is to liven up a crowd and/or trigger something in the average listener. You got nothing to lose!

3) Carry On. Stay the course of good old fashioned country values. Pay no mind to the fact that like all genres it has been changing steadily over the past fifty years, there's a formula that you're going to stick to regardless. The purists may or may not appreciate it but those who like boring tunes to stick on the stereo and have on in the background as they do chores around the house will be pleased. A safe strategy. Too safe, really.

I know which one I would have chosen to avoid.

Score: 4

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Hey! Where's...?

In addition to Buck Owens, another legendary singer-songwriter would be denied the top spot in favour of the very so-so Hank Locklin. "Only the Lonely" is obviously one of Roy Orbison's finest singles and it seems like everyone who records a cover version of it does pretty well with it too. The Big O would soon have a pair of Canadian number ones so what does it matter if this one just missed out anyway? Besides, it's still fondly remembered and, as I say, it would almost be an achievement if anyone managed to mess up a version of their own. Orbison was always on the periphery of country just as he was with rock so he probably didn't need to worry about following any of my tips listed above. Plus, he was an extremely talented individual and he didn't need my shitty advice.